(Home-My Story).......                 True, Tragic and Unnecessary Gay Youth Suicide Stories......................        (Espańol) 


PART 2 - Page 10 of 34
Myths and Misinformation - Is Homosexuality a Choice?

Psychiatry Giant, Dr. Robert L. Spitzer, Sorry for Backing Gay ‘Cure’
The Ex-Gay Movement is Dead

Homosexuality is not a choice. How do I know that?  My personal life experience as a bisexual screams that reality to me every day of my life.  Homosexuality is like left-handedness. It is a given.  Also, it is a myth that gay or lesbian teachers (or any other gay or lesbian person for that matter) recruit their students into becoming homosexuals and suck them into the “homosexual lifestyle”. That is not possible. You are either homosexual or you are not. It is not a choice (except maybe for the bisexual like me or in living situations where the opposite sex is not present like in prisons, the military, religious monasteries or private single sex boarding schools). The evidence from scientific studies and the recorded stance from all of the medical community gives backing to the reality that almost all gay or lesbians know personally, at least by their mid 20’s but usually in their teens, that homosexuals are indeed born that way and in no way can they choose to be heterosexual as the ex-gay proponents fraudulently claim. They know that homosexuality is like being left-handed. And since being gay is not a disease it doesn’t need to be cured (1).

And anyway no human being chooses to be something that the bigots of the world dump their hatred and wrath on daily. Also there is no “homosexual lifestyle”, no more than there is a “heterosexual lifestyle”. Just because there are some bar hopping heterosexual men who use and mistreat women by going from one abusive sexual affair into another, we don’t accuse all heterosexual men of being the same.

I like the way that William E. Burleson approaches the whole idea that gays chose, ha-ha, their orientation in his book "Bi-America-Myths, Truths, and Struggles of an Invisible Community":

. . . . . this is a hot issue for lesbians and gays.  Do they choose to be gay?  Can they change their mind?  It is absurd.  There may or may not be a "gay gene," but it is clear people are not in control of their sexual attractions.  They are in control of their actions, but I argue no one is in control of their feelings.  I can't stub my toe and decide not to let it hurt: it's a feelings thing.  Look at it another way: if it were a choice, there would be very, very few non-straight people.  After all, why would anyone put up with the abuse this culture doles out for being attracted to the "wrong" gender if they had a choice?  Several ministries promising to make people straight, or at least act straight, have been wildly unsuccessful.  Can anyone really believe people who sign up for this program fail because they really don't want to change?  All of them? As a friend who attended such a program told me, "If it were possible to pray hard enough to become straight, I would be straight now.  No one can pray harder or want to be straight more than I did."  (2)


Escape From the Ex-Gay Movement by Christian Mentz in the Huffington Post - January 5, 2015


Christian Schizzel was once the poster child of the "ex-gay" movement. After leaving the movement, he called out the conversion attempts that he suffered through for what they are: something terribly dangerous.

From The New York Times

Psychiatry Giant Sorry for Backing Gay ‘Cure’

Dr. Robert L. Spitzer, above, is a major architect of the modern classification of mental disorders.

Published: May 18, 2012

PRINCETON, N.J. — The simple fact was that he had done something wrong, and at the end of a long and revolutionary career it didn’t matter how often he’d been right, how powerful he once was, or what it would mean for his legacy.

Dr. Robert L. Spitzer, considered by some to be the father of modern psychiatry, lay awake at 4 o’clock on a recent morning knowing he had to do the one thing that comes least naturally to him. He pushed himself up and staggered into the dark. His desk seemed impossibly far away; Dr. Spitzer, who turns 80 next week, suffers from Parkinson’s disease and has trouble walking, sitting, even holding his head upright.

The word he sometimes uses to describe these limitations — pathetic — is the same one that for decades he wielded like an ax to strike down dumb ideas, empty theorizing and junk studies. Now here he was at his computer, ready to recant a study he had done himself, a poorly conceived 2003 investigation that supported the use of so-called reparative therapy to “cure” homosexuality for people strongly motivated to change.

What to say? The issue of gay marriage was rocking national politics yet again. The California State Legislature was debating a bill to ban the therapy outright as being dangerous. A magazine writer who had been through the therapy as a teenager recently visited his house, to explain how miserably disorienting the experience was.  And he would later learn that a World Health Organization report, released on Thursday, calls the therapy “a serious threat to the health and well-being — even the lives — of affected people.”

Dr. Spitzer’s fingers jerked over the keys, unreliably, as if choking on the words. And then it was done: a short letter to be published this month, in the same journal where the original study appeared.

I believe,” it concludes, “I owe the gay community an apology [for my study making unproven claims of the efficacy of reparative therapy," Spitzer wrote. "I also apologize to any gay person who wasted time and energy undergoing some form of reparative therapy because they believed that I had proven that reparative therapy works with some 'highly motivated' individuals."]  Click Here to continue to read this very informative article in the New York Times.  For more analysis of how the above flawed study affected the gay community, click below on "How One Flawed Study Spawned a Decade of Lies" from Forbes.com.

How One Flawed Study Spawned a Decade of Lies

Click Here for What Parents of Gay and Lesbian Teens need to Know about Suicide - What Are The Warning Signs?


It's Over!
The Ex-Gay Movement is Dead
(...well it's on life support in any case)

Exodus International Shuts Down Completely
and Apologizes

Exodus Int’l President Alan Chambers, leader of 37-year old ministry, admits grave errors and says to the Gay Community: “We’re Sorry”

Irvine, Calif. (June 19, 2013) — Exodus International, the oldest and largest Christian ministry dealing with faith and reparative/ex-gay/sexual orientation change therapy, issued an apology to the gay community for years of undue suffering and judgment at the hands of the organization and the Church as a whole.

“I am sorry for the pain and hurt that many of you have experienced.

I am sorry some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt when your attractions didn’t change.

I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents."

“I am sorry I didn’t stand up to people publicly ‘on my side’ who called you names like sodomite—or worse.

I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know.

I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him, I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart.

I am sorry I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine."

“More than anything, I am sorry that so many have interpreted this religious rejection by Christians as God’s rejection. I am profoundly sorry that many have walked away from their faith and that some have chosen to end their lives."

“You have never been my enemy. I am very sorry that I have been yours. I hope changes in my own life, as well as the ones we announce tonight regarding Exodus International, will bring resolution, and show I am serious in both my regret and offer of friendship. I pledge that future endeavors will be focused on peace and common good.”
, , , , , , . . . . . . .

In January 2012 then- president of Exodus International Alan Chambers, during his address to a Gay Christian Network conference, stated that 99.9% of conversion therapy participants do not experience any change to their sexuality and apologized for the previous Exodus slogan "Change Is Possible".  Source: Wikipedia.org
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Click Here to read the rest of the statement by Exodus International on their new website.  For more details on this development click Here.  The end of the Exodus Era is something to be grateful for ... but it should not be confused with the end of religion based homophobia.  Click Here to read more about this.

So what does all of the above mean?  Reading the articles listed below plus the readers' comments helped me, Gary Lynn, get a handle on it all:

Apologies Are Too Late When the Damage Is Already Done by Rev. Dr. Cindi LoveExecutive Director, Soulforce

Ex-Gay' Group Shuts Down, But Movement Is Re-Branding by Michelangelo Signorile, Editor-at-large, HuffPost Gay Voices

Exodus International Ex-Gay Survivor Discusses 'Homoerotic' Experience: 'The Damage...Was Astounding' (VIDEO) The Huffington Post | By Alexandra Schuster

John Paulk, 'Ex-Gay' Leader, Apologizes For Involvement In Reparative Therapy Movement The Huffington Post | By Glennisha Morgan - In this article John Paulk says:
“For the better part of 10 years, I was an advocate and spokesman for what’s known as the 'ex-gay movement,' where we declared that sexual orientation could be changed through a close-knit relationship with God, intensive therapy and strong determination," he said. "At the time, I truly believed that it would happen. And while many things in my life did change as a Christian, my sexual orientation did not."

He added, "Today, I do not consider myself 'ex-gay,' and I no longer support or promote the movement. Please allow me to be clear: I do not believe that reparative therapy changes sexual orientation; in fact, it does great harm to many people." updated 28august2013

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
(1) You can read the groundbreaking exposé of the ex-gay movement and the lies and misinformation it promotes and the deep hurt and harm it causes in “Anything But Straight:
Unmasking the Scandals and Lies Behind the Ex-Gay Myth”, by Wayne R. Besen-See Bibliography on page 31 or click here.  
(1) Burleson, William E. "Bi America-Myths, Truths, and Struggles of an Invisible Community", New York, London, Oxford; Harrington Park Press, 2005, page 45.

A Gay Teen Short Story ♂♂
GOD MADE ME THIS WAY by Grant Bentley

Church is so confusing for Zack.  His new pastor preaches nothing but hate and condemnation of gays and lesbians, but no matter how carefully he reads his Bible, he can’t find where it says God hates him.  Will things change when Zach's boyfriend Billy suggests that they all go to his church instead?    Click Here or on the icon to read the story.


Click for Page 11 - Reasons for Continued Negativity Towards Homosexuals
                          Gay Sex is Morally Wrong Because It Makes Straights Very Uncomfortable?
                          Over 5,900 Gay Friendly Christian Churches in the USA


Click below to go to:
The Anti-Gay Religious Right's Really Cruel and Idiotic Argument
Their Message to a Gay Person is: Be alone. Live alone. Die alone.


Click for Homosexuality is neither a Choice nor a Sin - Table of contents

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